Let's 8EAT Counter-Strike Source!!!!!!!! (8est Let's Play)

[arachnidsGrip]

Hey guyyyyyyyys. I just noticed you were prancing about in your stupid games here and thought you might need a good dose of actual game. You know, something that matters. Something with challenge. So 8asically, I'll 8e generous here and show you my "Attempt," (if you can call it that, the term is a 8it of an understatement!) at gaming for an audience.
Soooooooo of course I picked the only First Person Shooter that even MATTERS. Every other game 8asically caters to the scru8s, so the only game worth even TALKING a8out is Counter-Strike Source. It may not as good as the games I USED to play, 8ut its as close as I can get right now.



Okay so due to a 8it of... unpleasantness in the past, I've 8een 8anned from the CSS servers. I think they just couldn't handle my 8ada**itude. Or my trash talk for that matter. So I'll have to play against stupid 8ots.



Not that this is a handicap, expert level 8ots have 8etter twitch reflex than most humans. I was considering fighting against my desire to play cs_italy, and instead playing de_dust, which is the 8est level. 8ut I thought "nah forget it, Vriska Serket does not give into her impulses (unless she AGrees with them one hundred percent, which is all of the time.)" Italy it is.




Ughhhhhhhh load times. God I h8 these! It can cut the graphics if it wants I just need the gameplay and I need it fast!



SOOOOOOOO 8OOOOOOOORING




Fin8lly!!! It felt like it took ages for this piece of sh** to load. Of course, I am picking the Counter Terrorists. They have the superior weapons and spawn vantage. Also the multiple path structure of their spawn makes camping an almost non-issue and it's a 8otmatch so I don't even have to worry about retarded wall hackers 8eing cheating a**holes. It's like they can't even PLAY games, the lousy 8****rds. Enough on those schlu8s though! Let's start this slaughter!



GIGN. Not that it matters. I tried to see if one of the skins surpassed the others in camouflage, but have no actual gameplay difference. Unless you're playing someone color8lind. Or 8lind. Whatever. I haven't the time for pointless and stupid semantics that are pointless and stupid. Pointlessly. And Stupidly.



Heeeeeeeere we go folks, welcome to The Own Zone, population Red Team. Hahahahahahahaha this is going to be so quick it'll almost 8e 8oring. Also Haha at the starting pistol. I'd swap this pea shooter for the desert eagle if I didn't already know I'll have enough ammo in my f8vorite gun to finish these guys in an instant. This is more a speedrun than a competition.



Only worthwhile weapon right here, has almost the only good damage to clip size ratio. Definitely the 8est anyway.



There we go! Hahahaha they all picked long range guns. In a predominately close range map even! What a 8unch of idiots! I guess this is what I get for going up against stupid ro8ots.



I'll go ahead up to the main courtyard. Up past here is normally where most of the 8loodshed goes down.



Alright! Around the alley here will 8e a large stone arch where the red team will no dou8t swell up on their side of it. Tactical planning phase is in motion. I'll have to run around the second alley there and HOPE that there is no one taking that approach as well. It would help if my 8uddies stay the f*** off my back for this little 8it of 8uisness. I can make it to the other side as long as there isn't anyone already clogging the arch there.



Awesome




8ullseye.



Okay, now when I move out of the alley here, I'll just hope that I can catch enough of them off guard to cause a 8reak in the ranks. Here goes!



AHAHAHAHAHA LOOKS L8KE YOU G8YS FORG8T TO CH8CK 8OTH W8YS 8EFORE CR8SSING THE RO8D!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA
OH SH8T! Looks like a few stragglers spotted me in the 8ack! Time for a 8attering ram approach.



Just pull 8ack the ram........



And then 8ring it 8ack around and finish the rest off!



Ahahahaha. Laughing pretty hard at the red blood!!! Hahahaha. Time to round the other corner and...



...Kick some more ro8otic a**! Goodnight "Pat." What kind of stupid name is Pat? A stupid and dum8 name. That is the kind of stupid a** name Pat is.



Let's check the scores here. Ahahaha We are SL8YING TH8M H8RD!!!!!!!! We've lost one stupid guy and they only have three left. And look who's at the top of the 8oard there. It's only going uphill from here. My Teamm8es keep telling me to go rescue the hostages, 8ut that isn't how Vriska Serket plays this game. No. She plays for KEEPS. The o8ject to me is kill the other team, the hostages can go f*** off! I'm here to win! Not immerse myself in some stupid rescue scenario! Only whiny 8a8y losers care a8out anything but winning. This is what we call scru8s! 8ESIDES! Winning IS the fun part!
Also, I gave all my 8ots the initials CG in honor of a certain someone I wouldn't mind dead. Or at least 8leeding profusely. Time to round ANOTHER corner. Might as well camp on one and wait for a rush like the rest of the che8ers that populate this game. Not that I can't 8eat them anyway, that is pro8a8ly the real reason I was 8anned.



See what I mean! A camper! He went down just as easy as Pat, the poor 8****rd. There's only one more corner to assualt...



AND 8AM HE W8S W8ITING FOR ME!!!!!!!! Hahahaha no worries though, I turned the corner firing. Just a 8it of female intuition you could say. Or may8e winners intuition. Like there's a difference. Anyway time to go finish off CG Dean and win the whole d8mn game.


Oh looks like one of my friends helped me out there and did the work all 8y himself! What a winner that guy is! Not as much as me though, as evidenced by this 8rand new 8adge I just got. Look at how long that took me. :38 SECONDS!!!!!!!! Sweet jegus it's like why don't you guys actually try to 8eat me. TRY to contest my gr8ness. I am too good at being the 8est.


So there you have it. The Vriska Approach to gaming. Which is the 8est approach. And argua8ly the only approach worth noting.

Seeya later losers :::;D



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