The Age of Fatso [Obligatory CHAT pun avoided]

[Uzi-Bazooka]

I'm baaack, and I've been busy!

[Kinda Long Hair]

so im totally auditioning for this WGI thing (professional marching band), but the schedule looks... pretentious. I mean look at this! At least i'd get to miss like a freaking week of school....

[Uzi-Bazooka]

It's the Commutative Pretentiousness Property of Bands.

Simply stated, the more times a band describes themselves as an "ensemble" on their website, the more of a bunch of pretentious d*ckbags they are. The one you are looking at joining suffers at 33 times. Therefore,

(33) * 0.01 * 100
------------------- = 0.66 douchalons
[2^7 - (7 * 4)]

Therefore, the band you want to join is in the 80th percentile of pretentious d*ckbaggery.

(By the way, my band website does this 15 times, which I find is around average.)

[It]

I may have said this before, but I'll say it again. I LOVE this forum.

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Dawwww. We love you too, DJ. In a cool-but-not-gay-sort-of-platonic way.

[Kinda Long Hair]

Is this a ghost town or what

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Town be trippin' ghosts.

[Kinda Long Hair]

place is BAWLIN. ghosts be around like you neva seen! i saw one and was like "Are you serious Wendy"

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Indeed, there is a highly promise volume of ghosts.

[Falcon Paunch]

OoOooOoO... scary noiseeeeeees....

[Kinda Long Hair]

now we have to let it sit a few more weeks

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Then, salt to taste, and stir until it has the same texture as the color red and smells like philosophy. Serve with a sprinkle of insanity, or with best results, a large dollop of What-the-Heck.

From How to Cook Your Very Own Forum
{Published in the US as: I Am Strongbadiathefree (And You Can Too)
By U.Z. Bazuke}

[Kinda Long Hair]

this is our show this year. Our drum break is pretty sick. nbd or anything

[Strong Vader]

heck yes

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Oh, give me a break.

[Kinda Long Hair]

[Strong Vader]

The 1950s article on Wikipedia was once hacked to read something about China being run by pandas and kung fu in its "Economics" section.

[Uzi-Bazooka]

Trolls trolls.

[These are my saturdays]

I recovered from my hand-lessness.

[Strong Vader]

did you get fingered in some crime

[Uzi-Bazooka]

If so, that would've been very handy.

[Strong Vader]

you should have just palmed it off on someone else

[Uzi-Bazooka]

as long as you weren't armed and dangerous

[Kinda Long Hair]

fall break weak! (whut wuut!)

Uzi: play me. AOEIIITADEP

[Uzi-Bazooka]

You guys have a fall break?
*fuuuUUUUURRRRRYYYYYY....*
The entire state of Ohio can bite me.

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